Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Update On Swinebread
I just spoke to him on the phone.
No, he's not dead.
Nor has he suddenly been bitten by a radioactive insect, discovered his parents were actually gods or aliens, walked into the path of an atomic experiment or any other thing that would have bestowed him with superpowers. He can't have superpowers. For one thing he's not single. We all know only single people have superpowers.
Swinebread is not serving time in an intergalactic prison, banished to the Phantom Zone or trapped in a giant block of ice to be revived thousands of years in the future. Neither he nor the city he lives in have been shrunken down so they can sit on the mantle of some super schlub.
He's definitely not a zombie or any other form of undead.
On the other side of the coin he hasn't been trapped on Paradise Island to be fawned over by hundreds of 6-foot tall Amazonian women that look suspiciously like Lynda Carter. So he doesn't have that going for him.
He's simply without computer access since the move. He plans on continuing this blog and sends his love to y'all.
So Commisioner Gordon you can stop shining the Swinebread Spotlight into the sky to call him out of his Swine Cave. He'll be back to fight crime, talk comics and piss me off when he fails to agree that Joss Whedon is the second coming of Christ before you know it.