Sunday, February 3, 2008


A long time ago, kids were supposed to have a favorite football team. Now, I’ve never been into sports of any kind except for some mild enthusiasm for basketball and soccer (playing it, not watching it as it’s one of the most boring games in the world to watch) consequently, I was in big trouble in grade school. I got really tired of other kids pestering me about my lack of a favorite team, so figured I better pick one. As a kind of protest vote I decided to choose the lamest one I could find. Knowing nothing about Football at all, I asked around and got a few names from some the other kids. I studied the logos and decided that the design I liked the best was from some team called the Patriots.

Well, that choice was inspired because when I proudly told the other sports mongers that my favorite team was the Patriots; people looked at me like I was crazy and left me alone. But years later, a funny thing happened, the Patriots started wining games, and became quite popular. Instead of the usual “you’re crazy" look I’d get from folks, I started getting animated responses and engagement for long winded conversations about a team I knew nothing about and games I cared little for. When I couldn’t name any of the players, they would get suspicious and I’d end up having to explain why the patriots were my favorite team, because they “used to suck.” At that point of the conversation, I’d finally get the familiar “you’re Crazy” look.

Now all this sounds like a lot of work, so why don’t I just switch to a new team that sucks? There are two reasons: one, I’m old enough that folks can talk about other things besides Football, so I can steer the conversion to something else; and two, I’ve hardly ever stuck with something and seen it through, so why not stay with the Patriots.

So the Patriots are my favorite NFL team but not because they are any good. I don’t know the members, I don’t know any of their statistics and I don’t really give a rat's ass if they win today. They are my team because they were losers a long time ago and they had a dude in revolutionary costume on their helmets.


-Swinebread

11 comments:

Randal Graves said...

I love their old logo. Then again, I'm the only football fan who prefers the Bengals uniforms to their old boring 70s ones.

Go Brown - er, oh yeah.

Dr. Zaius said...

Women's volleyball is a lot more interesting to watch, and you don't don't even care what the score is!

Arkonbey said...

I too loved their old logo (grew up in Central Mass.). The new one is just so... boring? Cheesy? Trendy? Just like every other modern logo with a swoopy bit?

I still really enjoy watching football, but I at the age of 10 that every Patriot wasn't from New England, and it turned me off of being a FAN. Why get all territorial about guys who are basically mercenaries?

Don Snabulus said...

Go Pats! Wait, they lost. Go Giants!

I like your reasons. I chose the Dolphins because they had neat colored uniforms. I was lucky because they were great when I was a kid. Now I am lucky because they are so bad, I was able to pick up a jersey on line for about 75% off.

Lucky.

Eaglewing said...

Well, if you picked them 'cause they were losers, they kept the tradition alive for you, albeit in the worst possible game to do it in. I don't care at all about football, so I cheered for the underdogs - and what the hell, they won! I should have bet on this game...

Pandabonium said...

I've never had an interest in "professional" sports, so I never developed friendships with people who were big fans. More difficult to walk away from relatives...

Doctor Smoke said...

sports shmorts!

PAC-MAAAHN!!!!!!

Swinebread said...

Randal – logos uniforms are important; it’s how they present themselves to the world.

Dr. Zaius – too true, women’s sports are much more interesting

Arkonbey – “The new one is just so... boring? Cheesy? Trendy? Just like every other modern logo with a swoopy bit?” No respect for something classy…

Having no football team in Oregon, it’s hard to get all territorial about any team, although some try with the Seahawks.

Snab – who cares if they won or lost it wasn’t a boring game for a change.

I like the dolphins logo but they were a good team back then

Eaglewing – lol, Yeah they blew it, but it was a fun game even for us non-sports types.

Dr. S – it’s true that video games have eclipsed sports…

Dean Wormer said...

Awesome. I love the Chauncey Gardner aspect of you walking into rooting for the best team in decades to grace the NFL.

Will "Filby" Staples said...

Yeah, I root for the Pats too, but it's really only 'cause I'm from Massachusetts and see it as some kind of obligation.

Swinebread said...

dean - that's a good analogy

will - wow, I wonder what that must be like sense we have no NFL team here